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Monday, December 05, 2005

Attention Virginians

Attention to all people living in Virginia. The white stuff which has been falling from the sky today is called SNOW. It is in no way, shape, or form, an indication of impending doom. The sky itself is not falling, just the snow, which itself is nothing but frozen rain.

I say this because, for a group who sees snow every year, you more freaked out about it than anywhere I've been, including Los Angeles, where they lived through it. Once. In 1985.

Having a "heavy snow warning" issued for 3-6 inches of snow is a laugher to those of us who lived in Wisconsin and Illinois in December, 2000 when there was 49 inches of snow in the month. This is barely a dusting by Buffalo standards, where 2 feet of lake effect snow are considered normal.

Also, as a warning, the guy in the Volvo commercial; the one who drives 80 miles an hour on snow covered roads; is a professional driver on a closed course. He has no chance of hitting the car next to him on the road, because there is no one next to him.

Just because your car is all wheel drive, or your truck a 4 wheel drive doesn't mean you can't slide. In fact, it just means you have four wheels with power to them spinning you in circles. SLOW DOWN when it snows.

Closing schools for 2-4 inches of snow? PLEASE. Just last winter my daughter's school was delayed by 2 hours, after 11.5 inches of snow in one night. Buy some damn plows, and get the kids to class, have you seen your national scholastic scores?

That's Bob's winter rant! Let it Snow! Let it Snow! Let it Snow!


Blogger Jeff H said...

Dude, here in Louisville, KY, ever since they started busing for purposes of racial desegregation back in '75, practically every time there's a couple of inches, they shut down the city. And people start driving like complete idiots, running stop signs, blowing through traffic lights--ostensibly because "I'd have started skidding if I'd hit the brakes". Moronies, all of 'em...

10:29 PM  
Blogger Crazy Politico said...

Yeah, just slowing down a little makes a big difference. I once spent three days in Tucumcari, NM, because of 5 inches of snow in Amarillo, which completely shut down I-40. Seems north Texas doesn't own a plow. The lady on the radio on day 2 said "We ain't had enough sunshine to make it go way yet"

4:35 AM  
Blogger Corie said...

Funny post!
I can completely relate to just how stupid some people can get during bad weather! Over the last 10 to 15 yrs we've had a big increase in people from California and Texas (no offence to Gayle if she reads this, since she has lived just about everywhere including Co. she is not one that I am referring too!) moving here to Colorado that have ABSOLUTELY NO CLUE how to drive in snow! They fly down the highways at warp speed and then look completely baffled when they plow right into a cement barrier...or the car next to them.
They're also the ones that when they move here, buy the all wheel or 4 wheel drive cars and then just assume that that somehow negates the 6 inches of snow along w/ the 2 inches of ice below that on the streets, highways and overpasses.

10:53 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Snow in my neck of the desert would shutdown the city. Many of us would likely turn to animal sacrifice until it stopped.

12:54 PM  
Blogger Crazy Politico said...

Mark, I thought all you Arizona folks were hunters anyway, and do animal sacrifices for dinner regularly :)

Corie- Isn't it fun to try and convince people that 4 wheel drive slides on ice! The bad thing here is the number of rednecks with trucks jacked up 2 feet driving 65 in the ice. Yahoo!

6:58 PM  
Blogger Jeff H said...

Hey, man, if they're jacked up high enough, they'll just go right over you, no problem.

8:35 PM  
Blogger Amal said...

Try being an insurance adjuster in Canada after the first snow fall. Now that is a joy. :)) Nice blog. Thanks for your comments on my post.

12:36 AM  
Blogger Crazy Politico said...

Thanks for visiting Amal, and keep coming back!

As for the job, no thanks, it would mean moving north of here!

5:01 AM  

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